Goodbye Old Friend.....

Today, the day after Christmas, I bid a sad goodbye to something that has been with me through thick and thin, good and bad, ups and downs... but also to something that I've become addicted to and reliant on EVERY.SINGLE.DAY for the past several years.. yes, today, my Scale and I bid adieu... I know there are several of you out there who are shocked by my admission, but yes, Suzy the Scale and I needed to part ways.. I have been finding myself Obsessed with getting on the scale every morning before I shower (after I pee, of course!) and getting discouraged when it doesn't go the way I want it to. This is not the life I want to live!!! Before you all go thinking I'm CRAZY... I still have my scale on the Wii, which will be used only weekly for check-ins.. I'm promising myself that, kind of like an early New Year's Resolution.

My last couple of days surrounding Christmas have been pretty good. I've come to the conclusion that if it's a bread-like substance, I cannot eat it. I've been having a really hard time keeping food down so I'm assuming that means I have pretty good restriction with my most recent fill last week. Timmy and I had a fabulous Christmas Eve dinner at a restaurant in Scottsdale called Eddie V's. I've been wanting to go there for a while b/c I love seafood, and it was worth the wait! I had some amazing Crab stuffed Shrimp and an heirloom tomato and Buffalo Mozzarella salad. Thankfully, I did not have to eat a lot to feel full and it all stayed down!!

We spent Christmas day with Michelle and Brandon and Michelle's family. It was fun and got a little out of hand towards the end of the evening with the boys having a bit too much to drink!!

When I told Kennedy about getting rid of my scale, this is how she reacted! She couldn't believe it!

some other misc pictures from yesterday -

Timmy was doing his impression of Santa for KD - Ho, Ho, Ho..

This would have been a cute one until Jay jumped in without us knowing!!!

Laughing at Tim not knowing how to take the picture

And finally, an almost smily KD with her Godmother and Mommy!

Ups and Downs, Highs and Lows..

As I sit here wracking my brain to come up with something to write for my annual Performance Review ( I mean, I know I did a LOT of stuff this year in my job, so why isn't it coming to me to write it down?? ) I started letting my mind wander about my past year and how much has gone on with me, Jen... not work related, but Jen related.

I've definitely had a very crazy year, full of lots of highs and a couple lows.. thought I'd share..
So, was 2009 a good year?? I think so!!! I know that 2010 is going to be even better!!!

Let's start with the good stuff!!!

Highs:

1. The Obvious - my surgery to change my life.. I honestly didn't think that when I had my first visit on 11/3/08, that I would actually go through with this. I never commit fully to anything ( besides my marriage!) so I thought that I would either chicken out or change my mind.. so glad I didn't.

2. We had some awesome trips this year!!! Mexico, Atlanta, Chicago, LA, Sedona, Vegas.. we were traveling fools

3. Frequent visitors.. we saw my parents and our closest friends several times this year - we LOVE visitors!!! Hopefully we'll be seeing lots more of you all next year!!

4. Sweet Little Kennedy H was born!! And all of our lives were changed for the better..

5. Michigan State made it to the National Championship in BBall.. and then lost! :(

6. Tim's job hiccupped a little but he ended up successful this year!

7. I went to see Ellen!!! And got to dance and laugh and swoon over RPatts!!

8. I met some awesome people through blogs and reconnected through others on FB


Now, the Lows...

1. Too many close friends lost a parent this year. I can't imagine their pain and am so sorry..

2. I follow far too many Caring Bridge sites now.... if you have a Caring Bridge page, most likely, you have a serious illness. I know too many people who have a loved one that is sick..

3. I had a miscarriage when I wasn't supposed to be able to even get pregnant.. Like I have always said, this one is a catch-22 - it's a positive that I may be able to get pregnant some day, but a negative that the one time I am, I lose..

4. My dad told us this year that he will need a kidney transplant. Imagine how horrible it is to hear when you call the transplant coordinator that your BMI is too high and that you can't even be considered a candidate for donation. It's one of the things that keeps me motivated to keep working out and plugging away at this weight loss thing.. I want to at least be considered.

5. I missed my 20 year high school reunions, partly b/c I didn't want to go and be the "fat" girl or the one who has no kids yet..

Thankfully, the highs outweigh the lows.. I'm a firm believer in that you can only grow by going through the tough times.. unfortunately, Timmy and I have learned that far too many times in the past couple of years. That which doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right??

Ok, back to my review and trying to figure out how to say in so many words that I'm a Rockstar!!! :)

A Girl on a Mission..

That's me.... I have been a workout MACHINE for the past week!!! Definitely helped that I started seeing Kathi last week. Something has changed inside me and now all I can think about is how I'm going to fit in a workout everyday... not sure, but I hope I don't lose this motivation!! I have, however, fallen off the C25K train and need to get back to plugging away at that. I have less than 2 months before my 5K that I committed to so I need to get moving on that ASAP!!

Went in for my 2nd fill today. I was concerned b/c I felt like I was doing more work than my band was and my Dr confirmed that that might be the case for the first couple of fills and to not get discouraged. I only lost 2.5 lbs over the past two weeks since my last fill. I really want this weight loss to start moving more quickly, but I also have to keep telling myself that I'm in no rush.. it's going to happen, and knowing me, it's going to take time!! Everything does with me!! :)

She was really happy with my progress and even told me that my weight loss thus far is "off the charts"!! That made me happy!!! She's pretty much letting me decide when to get fills so I'm opting for every 2 weeks for now until I get to that "green zone"...

Nothing else going on except working this week and really looking forward to a quiet Christmas with Timmy and our friends. I have some last minute things to get Tim but otherwise, we are ready for the holidays to get here!!

Hope everyone is ready to have a great week!!!

js

Aches and Pains...

The flu is floating around my work, my home and the city in general.. however, my aches do not come from a case of the stomach flu, the head cold or even the swine flu.. my aches have one name and that name is Kathi... she's my new(old) trainer.. I went to see her yesterday for the first time and I can barely walk today.. AND, she took it easy on me!!!

I used to see Kathi about 2 years ago before the Great Stull Depression of 2007 hit and I had to get rid of some of the "luxuries" in my life in order to pay the bills. Picture Jillian from the Biggest Loser, but with blond hair. I actually love her, she's fabulous, and she kicks my ass. She was delighted to see that I hadn't changed much.. the usual "are we almost done.. ", "wait, I counted to 15, how are you only at 10?" and the other misc complaints that spew from my mouth were all present yesterday!! I know it's good for me, but man oh man does it hurt!!!

Anyways, not much else going on besides the pain! I had a great weekend in ATL with the fam!!! We kept joking that it was "forced family fun" but nothing seemed forced! We celebrated Christmas early and everyone loaded up with some fabulous gifts. Love, Love, Love my family!!

Me and CB

KB, me and Tim

Clay, Nana, Chief, Kate and Deuce!

Kate, Jeff, Beth, Clay and Deuce!

Beth, Mom and ME!!

Although I've had a great last couple of weekends traveling, I can't tell you how excited I am to just be home this weekend, catch up on my DVRd shows (how lame and I?) and just relax!!! Work has been crazy busy which is unusual for this time of the year and I'm ready for some downtime!!

On the weight loss front, I seem to have stalled AGAIN! It's irritating but I go in for another fill on Monday. I'm wondering for those lap band blog buddies.. did your first couple of fills not do a whole lot for you?? I'm trying not to get frustrated but my body is just not cooperating with me!! I know I'm in no rush, but I'd like to see some more movement downwards on the scale!!

Hope all is well with everyone. I need to blog more!!! :)

XO

Filled Up and Ready to Ramble...

"Lord I was born a Ramblin Woman".. that's how I feel lately with all the traveling I've been doing! We are leaving this morning to head to Atlanta for our family Christmas! Can't wait to see my family, especially my niece and nephew!!

After this trip, we are DONE for a bit in the travel department. It's funny, I don't normally travel this much and really until October, we hadn't gone ANYWHERE this year except to Michigan and by the way my co-workers harass me, you'd think I'd been gone every weekend all year. I keep reminding them of all the trips I had to cancel b/c of work, or b/c we thought we were launching a product at a certain time and we didn't. I know I shouldn't let it bother me that I get harassed, but I do a little b/c everything always seems to get done. Like for instance today, I'm technically on vacation, but have been working since 6:00 am! Oh well.. enough of my rant for today...

Got my first fill on Monday and was shocked at how easily it went. I mean, I know that I've read everyone else's blogs about how easy getting a fill is but I always think that mine would be painful or more difficult, and it was a piece of cake (oh how I'd love a piece of cake! ) I was on pretty much liquids Monday and Tuesday and graduated to mushies yesterday and today. I haven't been that hungry and thankfully, my weight loss has kicked back in.. down another 2 lbs!! My doctor was thrilled with my progress!! I go in again on the 21st for my 2nd fill. Right now I have 4cc's in my band. I know I should have asked how big my band is but I forgot! next time..

This past weekend I went to Chicago for the annual holiday party. It was so good to see my girlfriends (and their sig others as well). I could write blogs and blogs about how much I adore my friends but let me just say this about my Chicago peeps.. they are my heart and my soul.. they are the ones that get me the most and the ones that I know would be there for me in a second.. I don't have to talk to them often to know that we'll just pick up where we left off.. I heart them!!!

Hope everyone is doing well!! Back to blogging more often next week, once things settle down!

xo

Sweet Home Chicago...

Ok, so technically Chicago is NOT my home, however I do feel most at home here!!! This is where my closest friends are and there's something about this city that just makes me feel at home!

It's FREEZING though!!! I have to admit that I don't really mind it too much though since I only get to wear my favorite puffy coat once a year when I'm here! Speaking of said puffy coat, it's white and now it's REALLY puffy and oversized.. so I look like a goofy stay-puff marshmellow man!!

I'm here for a Holiday party with my girls! Yesterday while Shannon worked, I went out and about (on foot) and did some window shopping and getting some fixins for tonight's party. Then, Jamie picked me up in the kiddie mobile and we hung out with the kiddos and hit up a bar to meet up with TK.. 3 or 4 glasses of wine later, we ended up staying at Jamie's for the night!! It was so fun to catch up and just laugh and gossip!!! I remarked this morning after checking out my appearance that it's been a LOOOOOONNNNNNGGGG time since my bra went home in my purse after a night out!! :)

Looking forward to seeing my other girlfriends tonight!! Then back to Phoenix tomorrow, getting my fill on Monday (woohoo) and then off to Atlanta on Thursday for the family Christmas! I'm tired just thinking of it!!

xo
js

Monday can't come soon enough..

I'm stuck!!! I have not lost a lb in over 2 weeks.. It's making me batty!!!!
I have my first fill on Monday, thank goodness!!!
I'm happy that I haven't gained anything but now I know what Bandster Hell is.. I'm right in the middle of it.
Thankfully, my clothes are still getting bigger so I must be losing inches..
Ugh, just irritated..
that's all..